shades, fedora, and mayhem.

So. There is this annual Youth Easter celebration parade from the entire protestant churches in our province. Huge. Thousands of youth from across the province gathered in one place to worship and then march from point A to B. Me and a friend from my church -Rio- was elected as commitee member for our region, and we were appointed to be in charge of the attractions during the parade. We were supposed to setup a 'moving' stage that consist of acoustic musicians and singers. And then after that, the dancers.

This was pretty much like the -legendary gig- where all things went from bad to worse except this one went a little differently. So lemme walk you through it.

We were told by other commitee members that the mini truck we'll be using for that day (the plan was to use a loading container at first.)will be borrowed from one of the youth. Fine. So Mini Truck: Check.

And then we need to find an electricity generator around 2000 watts to accomodate all the gears and amps. One of the commitee members has one at his house. Fine. So Generator: Check.

Generators are unstable. They need a stabilizer with the same amount of watts. And the one from the other comittee members doesn't have one. So we borrowed from another friend who has a generatior with built-in stabilizer. So Generator + Stabilizer: Check.

The tambourine & banners dancers from our church agreed to perform on that day. Fine. So Dancers: Check.

We were prepared. What could possibly go wrong right?.

Right.

The day before the parade, the commitee chairperson for our region wanted to hold a prayer session. We were told to meet at 9pm. Okay. So me, Rio and 2 other friends (they tag along to pick up the mini truck and generator)arrived there at 9.15pm and as expected--the chairperson isn't even there yet. There were only us and 3 other commitee members. Fine. So we waited. 10 minutes later we got a call from the head of the commitee. The prayer thing was cancelled and we were supposed to settle things that weren't done yet and the chairperson with her prayer partner will pray for us. Fine. But then things went downhill from here and I started to cuss inside..

So now we went to the head of commitee's house. We were about to get the mini truck. We call the owner, she said that the car was lent to her father's friend, and we gotta pick it up from a place 30 minutes drive from our place. Fine. But then she said again that she's feelin uneasy to go and pick  up the car because it was already late. Yeah right. It's only 10pm. And if you ask me I'll gladly bang the door because I really frickin have to! It's for tomorrow for goodness' sake! Grrrr. Long story short, we were asked to find another mini truck. Son of a.. Nevermind.

So we decided to split up and look for mini truck for rent. At 10.30pm. Right. We went to look for it anyway, and while I made the calls, Rio and the others went to pick up the generator. I made lots of calls, and some of my friends helped out to call their friends asking for it, and even looked for it through the newspaper ads but even until 1.30am we couldn't find one. We are so screwed.

So the generator finally arrived. We checked on it, tried to turn it on, we couldn't. The starter switch doesn't work, the rope trigger is gone, and even though we used some plastic rope to trigger it, it wouldn't work. So we are so frickin screwed. First the truck, now the generator. Great. The last option we have is to rent a Microlet (our public transportation) with full sound system in it so the dancers may dance to the music comin from it.

I went home unsettled. The parade  tomorrow will be ruined. No... So I prayed so hard before bed. I cussed in my mind a lot by now -and i feel guilty- but now the Lord is my only hope. So I decided to leave it to The One with bigger hands.

So. 7.30am I went out looking for Rio and tried to figure things out. Then somehow one of our neighbor heard about our situation and offer their generator for us to use. According to them, it has stabilizer inside. Although the starter switch is broken, we can still use the rope trigger for it to work. With a little gasoline, we tried it, and it worked! YESSSHHHH! Mini truck left. It's already past 8am. We were supposed to gather with other youths from the region at 9am.

One of our other neighbor has a mini truck for rent and he heard about our situation as well. So he went to pick it up and gave it to us!! 

So the guys loaded all the amps, gears and generator, and then we tried to turn the stuff on, and it worked!! YESSSHHHHH!! But It's already past 9am and it started to rain. So we turned off the generator and everything. Then other commitee members started calling me because everyone is ready to go except our youth.

Still we need to find a tent to save all the gears and one of the neighbor offered us their tent. So yet again, we were saved. 2 of the commitee members were in the gathering venue and they noticed that it started to rain so they came to bring us tent. And told us that everyone was leaving without us except the commitee. The commitee member had a little conflict with the region's chairperson because the commitee didn't want to leave us. Aww.

We parked the car somewhere with shades, and then most of the youth were getting into the car ready to go. We agreed to startup the generator now, and set the sound on our way to the venue. Fine. Then one of my friend pulled the rope trigger. He pulled and pulled and the rope snapped.

Okay. I don't even know how to feel. It's now almost 10am.

The owner of the mini truck - our neighbor,  offered his generator for us. It's the whole package. 3500 watts with minimum noise, and built in stabilizer. 

Everything were supplied by our neighbors. 

OH THANK GOD!!!!!!!!
*reminded me about the Samaritans back then in BolehLand..

So off we went.

The setup there were pretty easy, we just need to deal with feedbacks and echoes from the mic and guitars. So we repositioned ourselves and et voila!

Guess what. We played for more than 4 hours, and to sip some water was our only time out. My hands were sore. I can't wave my right hand, and my left hand's fingers hurt when I type. Longest gig ever. Under the sun. My fedora was my only shade. I am tanned now. 

This one was very refreshing and somehow I felt pretty cool. I have never played on a moving stage before. Not even in BolehLand. Our audience was people on the roadside. I didn't know how many kilometres we went through in slo-mo, but it was damn far. 3 of the youths passed out along the way.

One thing that I've learned: Surrender.
Surrender doesn't mean NOT to do a thing and wait for a miracle to happen. But instead, keep trying, ask God for help and leave the outcome to Him. Even if things doesn't work out, then fine. It is still God's will. He has better plans and whether you like it or not, He holds the ultimate control over everything. We still gotta do our part and we let Him do His. You see, the help from our neighbor came unexpectedly and all the stuff worked out at the very last minute. We have no control over it. We need no sorcery to get things done, but things will eventually come into place if we surrender.

*I'll post the technical lessons I've got on another post, kay?

roller coaster ride~

*ohmygosh i found this post on my draft list and realized that I haven't even posted it yet after SO LONG!! It's been MORE THAN A YEAR @#$%^&*(*^%$#$%^&*
Lots of stuff happened and we pretty much ended up going separate ways since October  2011 - the graduation. Now me, Oxy and Jlt are rockin behind-the-desk life, and Tmg is rockin the hospital wards though sometimes Tmg and Jlt still rockin 'em stages with the Junkies.*

This was road to the epic Relay For Life Melaka gig - a cancer-awareness relay that was held in various states throughout BolehLand. Lots of cancer survivors were there. 
 

Thursday, June 3rd.

8pm            Worship practice

10.30pm     Jamming for Sat's Gig!!

                    *we stayed up till 5am+ trying to figure out how to use separate tracks for 

                   the gig. Apparently, we couldn't.*

tick tock tock tock

K.O

Friday, June 4th

6am               Hit the bed

9am               Mission training

                     *I was half dead during the process and it went on till almost sunset @.@*

7pm               Sound check

                     *when we arrived, the crew weren't done setting up and we were told to 

                      come back a couple hours later*

8pm               Saturday service practice

                      *Oxy and Tmg tagged along and waited quite a while for me to finish. Poor 

                      them.. Jlt texted Tmg that they still weren't done setting up -.- Tmg 
                    was pissed Oxy said.*

10pm+            Head home

                      *wanted to watch movie actually, but the info about the sound check came 
                      late and the ticket counter was already closed at that time. No choice.*


Saturday June 5th

1.40pm            GIG DAY!! Sound Check.

2pm                 *Tmg went back to change clothes.*

3pm                 *While waiting, we camwhored and Jlt bought us Kuihs.*

                            

4pm                 *Played at a huge balloon spiderman thingy. I knee-d my camera, 
                        broken beyond repair*

                    

see?

                        

5pm                 *Still haven't played yet. Fyi, our slot was supposed to be at ...... Tmg 

                        came back WITH THE SAME CLOTHES HE WAS WEARING. #$%^&* we 
                        told him to go back and change for real.. So he went back with Oxy.*

6pm                 *Still not our turn yet but the crew said that we would be up verrryyy 

                        sooon. Tmg and Oxy weren't back yet. I was having a panic attack and  

                        Jlt got reeeeaallly cranky.*

 

6.30pm+         *Tmg and Oxy stucked in a bad bad traffic jam in front of the stadium. Me 

                        and PMS-ing Jlt had no choice but to setup for them on stage.*

7pm                  *I was supposed to be in church already for Saturday service. I felt like 

                        crying cuz this was the first time for me to miss worship session when i 

                        was actually on duty!!! At this rate, I might miss the whole service T.T... 
                        Look! Oxy and Tmg finally arrived!!! :D*

7pm+                It's time to rock!! 

                             

                          *Messed up lots of chords and timing -.- but we finished it anyway then 

                        Tmg and Oxy rushed me to church. I had to change in the backseat! We 

                        were stuck in a traffic jam again, and we took the wrong flyover. 

                        I've never been to this church before. But after a couple of  

                        calls we found it. My 2 friends waited for me outside the church and 

                        they said that I've missed the free worship session, but the main 

                        worship is actually after the sermon!! Thank God! But then.. 

                        Oxy might lost her phone. So I left my bag in the car for her to search 

                        just in case it was there. Jlt lost his supercool chromatic tuner*

9pm+                 *During the sermon, I got a text. Oxy lost her phone :(  it was time for 

                         me to play. I didn't go for sound check earlier so i made some noise at 

                         1st x( I couldn't even concentrate in  worship. My heart was pounding 

                         like crazy and never slowed down even after more than  an hour..

                         It was like I just came down from a really sick roller coaster.*

10pm+               *Went to eat.. Didn't really have the appetite.. Then we made 

                         appointment with Momo to watch movie.. So we end the day with...*

                               


Sunday, June 6th
past midnight    *We were informed that we've got another slot in the morning! YAY!!*

7am+                  *Jlt texted me saying that the crew started the set up late so the whole 

                          slot will be delayed. It's gonna clash with Sunday service for sure. 

                          So, morning gig = NAY. Go back 2 sleep*

9.40am+             Sunday Service!!

                             *me, Josh and Oxy were on duty. So Josh picked me up. I was half 

                            awake when we arrived  at church and I was setting up with Josh 'till 

                            the worship leader asked us "where is Oxy" and I thought she was 

                            probably on her way here so I called her. 

                                   Me: "Oi, lu dmana?" [hey where are you?]

                           Oxy: "......Oh man. Gw telat bangun" [Oh man, I woke up late]

                           Without further ado Josh and I rushed to her house and picked her 

                           up. The worship leader was already explaining to the congregation 
                           of the reason why we were late when we arrived -.-*

12.40pm+            Prayer!!

                              *Me and Josh gotta rush to another church for this and somehow we 
                            made it in time even though our service time was different than 
                             theirs.*

2pm+                    * Finally can have loooonggg sleep*

8pm                     Rock Bar!! 

                                *Oxy, me and Momo went there. But when we got there, it has 

                               turned into a reggae bar -.- so we went to a bistro and then hit a 

                               hotel lounge with super slippery floor afterwards till 6am.*

*DAMN I MISS COLLEGE DAYS :( *

The craziest weekend of my life so far ended that Sunday. A thanksgiving Sunday for me. I thanked God that He lead us through this alive *and without ended up disbanded*. We lost stuff on that weekend. But for me, it was like a trade. That chromatic tuner, handphone, petrols, and camera were traded for precious memories and stronger friendship.

p.s. I miss you fellas so badly T.T

Passport to Fame - by Oxy

WAZZUP Y'ALLS! 

Damn I miss blogging. 

Couple of days ago I asked Oxy to do a guest post for this blog since I have nothin 'musical' enough to write about and she agreed! Oh by the way, Oxy was in the same band with me back in college *WE'RE NOT THAT OLD, OKAY!?* as you may have read in most of my posts, she's LEGIT.

She told me about this competition she went to so here it goes~

p.s: stuff in green r my jabbers.

Hello everyone!

It's my first time being someone's blog's guest writer! Yoohoo..

I am Lina *her real name* , I had not enjoyed live band performance for so long, until 14 March 2013, when suddenly my long lost friends aka Banana Junkies *TMG and JLT belong to this band too~* brought me to see a battle of the bands gig.

Little that I know about this gig, but PassportToFame is basically a battle of the bands where participants are required to travel to a few cities to perform and show their talents.

It is in Kuala Lumpur, Penang and Johor for the first, second and third auditions respectively. The gig that I attended was in Penang.

My long lost friends performed earlier (when I was occupied with work) so I didn’t see them rocking the stage. But I’m sure they were. Well, at least I saw the videos.

That night, I watched 3 bands and that’s enough to make my day. I was stunned, especially with the second band. They are ‘Epy&Ardiv’ , 7-piece band, consisting of sax, trumpet, drum, keyboard, guitar, bass and vocal. They played 3 songs, each with groovy reggae genre. The first song was ‘fly me to the moon’ and it was fiuhhh. I’ve listened to a few versions of the song and I could tell ya that they really really did a great job with their arrangement. The second song was an Indonesian song titled ‘BidadariManisku’. I think I never listened to this song before (or maybe I listened but I forgot) but they again really made music out of it. The last song was their original song titled ‘Teman’, with groovy beats. It was worth watching!

Overall, you can feel the oomph drum beats and bass lines, wonderful melodies from the trumpet, sax and keyboard, great guitar strumming and also good vocal. It was all the combination of skills, groove and showmanship. I was entertained!

It’s time for the judges to say some words. “You’re my favourite drummer”, one said. “The original song full mark, music full mark, performance full mark, congratz you guys have set the standard. It’s time for you guys to establish your identity. Checkered pattern shirts, probably with the hats”. Another judge said “The vocal needs some improvement”.

Yeah there is always a room for improvement. From my side, the keyboardist, sax and trumpet need to show more showmanship. It is also good to practice endurance especially for the vocalist, sax and trumpet as their volume was a bit softer during the third song. Lastly, I can’t hear what the guitarist said, during the introduction and also between the songs…so I believe he needs to work on that.

That’s all. Ciao!

Thanks for the guest post, Oxy!! 

Well, we may not be as -to be taken with LOTS OF SALT- "cool" as we were back in college, but some things remain the same. We still have the ears to tell if one is a quality music or not. 

Have a good day ;) 

Bunaken Jazz Fest

heylou evribadeh!

I went to a "festival" on October 20th. *gee, why write now?!* right?

Been pretty busy working and stuff, thousands of records to be filled so I didn't really have time to write :(

Anyway, It wasn't really a "festival".. More like a 'show' because it doesn't have multiple stages for starters, the stage is small, and it had only 3 performers in which one of 'em is the guest performer. Not to mention it was dirt cheap!

For me, this so-called fest is historical. Told ma dad that I'll be home late, then I'm off. I look for the tickets on my own a couple of hours before it began, and then troll at the mall to kill time. This was the first time for me to attend a concert/show by myself. Normally I'd go with friends and we'd comment on the event while watching the performers, or make fun of them hahahh

But that day actually I felt pretty lonely. Heh. But nevermind. At least I get to experience how does it feel like to watch a concert solo :P

As I expected, the event began SUPER LATE. They said that the gate will be open at 5pm, but then when I asked the guy at the ticket booth, he said 8pm. I went there 7pm and I spotted a side door. So I went in.

Nobody stopped me from entering and they just stared at me. Then I got to see the guest performer doing soundcheck :) It was fun! I've learned some stuff, which is the continuation of the lesson from last time "trust the sound engineer".. In this case , I learned that the performer should be a little demanding. If the sound is still not good, then don't settle!!! Don't let the bad sound influence people's judgment towards your music. That's why it is important for the performer also to LISTEN to their own sound during the soundcheck. That time, Monita--the guest performer noticed that her mic was too 'reverb-y' so she asked the engineer to reduce the reverb level.. She also asked for one more round after they set the sound. When I was listening to them, I really wanted to go to the control table and then tell them what to increase and decrease.. Because at that time, they set it in such a way that she sounded like she was having a cold. Ugh.. I mean, why didn't the engineers do something about it?

I would recommend performers to have that wireless jack thingy... It would help when you can go off the stage and then stand at the audience's place to hear what kind of sound they might be listening to during the real show.

The opening bands were okayy. But each of their bassist and drummers were FREAKING AWESOME!!! I mean. Damn. So freaking solid. The bass lines were really irresistible and groovin'!! I've got to nail 'em ghost notes. The bassists used them a lot that time, and it sounded really good.

That guy with plaids put a small paper against his mouth and start blowing it. IT SOUNDED LIKE A MOTHERFRICKIN SAXOPHONE!!!!!!! Reaaaalllyy GOOD! Even better than the guy who played the actual saxophone that night! And that guy on the keys, He was really good as well. Reminds me of Dy. My jizzyjazzin' pal back at historical city. Dy would've kick his ass.

Howkay.

That night I've found a whole new respect toward jazz genre. I've never given it much thought or attention, because it isn't really my cup of tea, and I was too lazy to bother. :P

The main performer that night was Monita Tahalea, Indonesian Idol finalist a couple of years back. Back in the competition she was already given the label 'jazz singer' because of her vocal characteristic. Boy that was right. Because she's mainly doing jazz gigs now. Jazz is what suited her best.

Her performance was mind blowing. Damn. I never really liked any female singer, but this one is different. Monita became my favorite instantly right after she sang a few lines. I don't know whether it was because the music or the voice. But I'm pretty sure it was the voice. Difficult to describe. It was like smooth-accurate-breathless. I mean, I CAN'T HEAR HER BREATHE IN BETWEEN THE LINES!! Madness. It was soooooo smoothhh I can just lay there and sleep. I felt high. I didn't even realize that I was standing for a long time because my head was floating when she sang. Seriously. Like I was on crack. I forgot how many songs she sang, but every single one of them was.. damn.. Really intoxicating. I don't know whether all slow - midtempo jazz have the same effect. That night was verrrryyyy relaxed, and Monita managed to create that friendly and relaxed atmosphere. That is a really good skill to have for a singer. I felt close with her because of the way she interact. She didn't go like "ARRREEE YOOUU REAAADDEEEHH?!?!" Instead, she started with a smile and a simple "Good Evening." The night went magical. I guess that's really appropriate thing to do.

The band accompanying her, hat's off. It was a really balanced flow, and the upright bass sounded mighty sexy hahahahah OH! no electric guitar, but a classic one instead, and the guitar guy's really good. Wait. They were all awesome. I realized that I don't like jazz songs with solos. 30 seconds, I still can bear. But more than that... Urgh. Please. Don't. For every other genre, I never liked any band with female vocalist. Well I do like some songs, but they won't be my favorite. 2 songs I can bear, but more than that.. *vomit* EXCEPT jazz. That night I doubted that I won't be able to bear listening to her all night but boy I was wrong. Maybe because It's her singing. Other jazz female singer, erm, I can't guarantee.

Well, soon after the fest, a friend gave me a hashtag to read on and I've found out that LOTS of people were disappointed with how it turned out -- including the MC for that night, and they were all bashing the one-man organizer. But heck I couldn't care less. Monita & band brought me to cloud nine and that's all there's to it :)

Involved my ass.

Guess what, we JOINED the competition. yes. Crazy? yes. I was the only one thinking that way. Oh maybe some of you too, readers?

Four days worth of practice we went. That gut feeling that normally came before a gig striked back right at the first step inside the venue. I was never more intimidated than this. Never more inconfident than this. Btw, this was the first time for our rhythm guitarist to ever join a competition.

The lions performed the day before us. Therefore, i felt a little better.

Long story short, we played badly. I stuttered during the first song so I missed one line of the chorus, and then I mentioned "check-in" instead of "check-sound" during the song introduction *although i corrected myself afterwards LOL, the syncopes didn't work out aaand the sound went nuts at the second song that one of the judge was covering his left ear. I'd say, the situation went 70% ok. I wasn't quite sorry for it because there were several bands who did worse--higher level of embarassment.

GOD how I thank You that You made it happened so that the big guns played the day before or else I'll be too discouraged to go on stage. There was 1 band who played SUPERBLY but they were on stage waaay after we played so I didn't really care :D

Oh! Also, out of the 60-ish contestants, we're in the top 20 so that didn't really discouraged me. I was even surprised.

I am fully aware that my band SUCK and this competition added more punctuation mark to our level of suckiness. Good. So that my bandmates can finally wake up!! As for myself, I would say that this competition motivated me. I am more pumped up to polish my scales, fingering, and groove among other things. I REALLY do hope that my bandmates would be as motivated as I am after all this.. For lessons during the gig, gee. Nothing significant, really. I went on stage the way I did before. Same drill. I guess I just need to choose the right words to say during band intros. Well. If I ever have the chance to do that again haha.

Now here's another thing. There is ANOTHER competition next month. I would say that this is waaay bigger than this one we just did. It's for our denomination only, but you see, this is THE most.. er.. prestigious band competition for young adults across the region. The pressure is waayy bigger and the competitors are waaayy more than before. This competition is like a pass-fail subject. When you fail, see you next semester (if you still have the balls). But if one wins this, hmph. You'll get EXPOSURE. Sweet deal. Seriously.

Let me break this down for ya. If one wins, one will be invited to most of the gigs this denomination holds, invited to play at churches/seminars/concerts across the province, and not to mention the 100% likelihood to be the OPENING ACT for any famous Christian performers when they come to perform in our province (the organizers are familiar with the word 'AUDITION' just like they are familiar with Hieroglyphics).

You might think: "Hey. Aren't you guys supposed to play for the glory of God and not to yourselves? Aren't you fellas supposed to use your talent for Him and don't care about what comes after if you win/lose?"

You see, it's a private matter between a believer and God, and people glorify God in different ways. Only God can judge, you can shut up.

Where I live now, people WANT to SHOW FACE all the time. Being asian, we don't want to LOSE FACE not even one damn time. But unlike most asians, people here don't grasp the very basic idea of WORKING HARD. The INVOLVEMENT is emphasized greatly while the process is neglected. Hence the shitty outcome. Even when it turns out bad, people will say "what matters is that you were involved."--quantity over quality. Sometimes they add "gotta do better next time" but that never really happen.

Anyway, another issue. I know how to play keyboard. In fact, I started off with that when I was a kid. That was practically the first official instrument I could play. But you see, my soulmate is the BASS!!! I feel like I can really express myself through it, and I feel that satisfaction everytime I play. Y'know, that feeling when you're pacing along with the drummer.. In short, I prefer Bass over Keyboard.

But then, I am the only keyboardist available (cuz the rest are aunties and one is out town), and my bandmates wants me to play Keyboard. Sigh. Gotta take one for the team.

We had a practice last night--a rather uninspiring one, acoustically cuz drummer couldn't make it. We had another friend to sing and based on the outcome last night, gee. I'd say: NEXT!

Sigh. It has never been THIS hard.

Stressful weeks ahead..

God, please strengthen me.

kept for long enough

I feel bad.

You see, there will be another competition coming up at the end of this month. I didn't tell you before, but i ditched the previous one last month.

Hard to admit, but I'm gonna say this anyway.

I don't believe in my band members.

I have no confidence to go on stage with them.

For a church thing, well fine. But for a competition, heck no. Zero confidence.

We are FAR from the 'ok' category. On the scale of 1 being the worst (play entirely off key, the like) and 10 being awesome, I would give ourself a 3. Yes that's how bad I think we are.

In dog-eating place, when a CHURCH is holding a "RELIGIOUS BAND FESTIVAL" *that's how they call it btw* inviting bands from churches from all around the province, especially when the word "INTER-DENOMINATION" is stated on the event ad, THEY MEAN NO SHIT. YOU BETTER BE GOOD.

Maybe you'll think that church fellas are just some goodiegoodie hymn-singing kids with absurd amount of hairgel who don't know awesome music, let alone play them. Or maybe you think that they play like Hillsong or Planetshakers at best.

Nope. I would say that the bands that join this, are WAY BETTER than Hillsong or Planetshakers.

Granted they are NOT Dream Theatre calibre, but they are still AWESOME! Even though the kind of music that they play are mostly not my cup of tea, but in terms of dynamics, balance and arrangements, they are really good. Each of the members know damn well what they are doing.

So this is what scares me. If we join this competition, we are kittens walking straight into lions' cage. It's not like they are violent. No. Most of them are really humble. But the thing is, if dive into that pool unprepared, we're just gonna bring embarrassment to ourselves.

Last time with GE and Rubberfellas, I am always confident wherever we go. Whether it is to a competition or just normal gig. Why? Because I know that we were prepared. We don't possess the skill of the Used or at least MCR. But then I am confident when I play with them because I know what we've done to get there. I was proud to play our originals. I know we worked our ass off to at least make it sound decent. Everybody was doing their homework. Even though I still have that butterflies and negative thoughts before going on stage, the peeps were there to support me *by being nervous in unison xD.

**sidenote: FYI, Oxy and Joney always looked as cool as cucumber before we go on stage, while JLT always have that "we're gonna knock your socks off" vibe*

With my band now.... *sigh*...

I can't keep a straight face whenever we practice. Normally I'd play 4-ish chords and then I'll go

At the end of the day, I went home unsatisfied and discouraged. I had to practice that 'inhale-exhale, inhale-exhale' thing throughout the practice session because of the sound we made. I felt bad that I can do nothing about that, and I felt bad that I tell them what to do too many times. Sometimes I just let them play the way they want, and halfway through I felt like I need to see a therapist or maybe stand at the edge of a cliff and scream my gut out.

I'm not a pro myself. But at least, I TRIED to polish the way I play. I TRIED to listen to what others are playing so I could come in at the right time without overpowering anyone.I made mistakes MANY TIMES and I would be happy if somebody else point it out so that I could improve!!

Dear bandmates, how long would it take for you to realize that we suck and that we need to work hard?!