Involved my ass.

Guess what, we JOINED the competition. yes. Crazy? yes. I was the only one thinking that way. Oh maybe some of you too, readers?

Four days worth of practice we went. That gut feeling that normally came before a gig striked back right at the first step inside the venue. I was never more intimidated than this. Never more inconfident than this. Btw, this was the first time for our rhythm guitarist to ever join a competition.

The lions performed the day before us. Therefore, i felt a little better.

Long story short, we played badly. I stuttered during the first song so I missed one line of the chorus, and then I mentioned "check-in" instead of "check-sound" during the song introduction *although i corrected myself afterwards LOL, the syncopes didn't work out aaand the sound went nuts at the second song that one of the judge was covering his left ear. I'd say, the situation went 70% ok. I wasn't quite sorry for it because there were several bands who did worse--higher level of embarassment.

GOD how I thank You that You made it happened so that the big guns played the day before or else I'll be too discouraged to go on stage. There was 1 band who played SUPERBLY but they were on stage waaay after we played so I didn't really care :D

Oh! Also, out of the 60-ish contestants, we're in the top 20 so that didn't really discouraged me. I was even surprised.

I am fully aware that my band SUCK and this competition added more punctuation mark to our level of suckiness. Good. So that my bandmates can finally wake up!! As for myself, I would say that this competition motivated me. I am more pumped up to polish my scales, fingering, and groove among other things. I REALLY do hope that my bandmates would be as motivated as I am after all this.. For lessons during the gig, gee. Nothing significant, really. I went on stage the way I did before. Same drill. I guess I just need to choose the right words to say during band intros. Well. If I ever have the chance to do that again haha.

Now here's another thing. There is ANOTHER competition next month. I would say that this is waaay bigger than this one we just did. It's for our denomination only, but you see, this is THE most.. er.. prestigious band competition for young adults across the region. The pressure is waayy bigger and the competitors are waaayy more than before. This competition is like a pass-fail subject. When you fail, see you next semester (if you still have the balls). But if one wins this, hmph. You'll get EXPOSURE. Sweet deal. Seriously.

Let me break this down for ya. If one wins, one will be invited to most of the gigs this denomination holds, invited to play at churches/seminars/concerts across the province, and not to mention the 100% likelihood to be the OPENING ACT for any famous Christian performers when they come to perform in our province (the organizers are familiar with the word 'AUDITION' just like they are familiar with Hieroglyphics).

You might think: "Hey. Aren't you guys supposed to play for the glory of God and not to yourselves? Aren't you fellas supposed to use your talent for Him and don't care about what comes after if you win/lose?"

You see, it's a private matter between a believer and God, and people glorify God in different ways. Only God can judge, you can shut up.

Where I live now, people WANT to SHOW FACE all the time. Being asian, we don't want to LOSE FACE not even one damn time. But unlike most asians, people here don't grasp the very basic idea of WORKING HARD. The INVOLVEMENT is emphasized greatly while the process is neglected. Hence the shitty outcome. Even when it turns out bad, people will say "what matters is that you were involved."--quantity over quality. Sometimes they add "gotta do better next time" but that never really happen.

Anyway, another issue. I know how to play keyboard. In fact, I started off with that when I was a kid. That was practically the first official instrument I could play. But you see, my soulmate is the BASS!!! I feel like I can really express myself through it, and I feel that satisfaction everytime I play. Y'know, that feeling when you're pacing along with the drummer.. In short, I prefer Bass over Keyboard.

But then, I am the only keyboardist available (cuz the rest are aunties and one is out town), and my bandmates wants me to play Keyboard. Sigh. Gotta take one for the team.

We had a practice last night--a rather uninspiring one, acoustically cuz drummer couldn't make it. We had another friend to sing and based on the outcome last night, gee. I'd say: NEXT!

Sigh. It has never been THIS hard.

Stressful weeks ahead..

God, please strengthen me.